conflicting feelings

Am feeling extremely conflicted recently.. guess it shows in the way I present myself. I try very hard to translate my thoughts through my dressing but often times it comes across as 'too much honey' do you get what I mean???? PROLLY NOT. anyhoo, I finished season 1 of Girls, its actually pretty witty and I like Hannah very much I find myself identifying with her just a little esp when it comes to writing LIKE GOD I CAN'T EVEN STRING A SENTENCE TGT THAT DOESN'T BORDER ON CLICHE AND UNINTELLIGIBLE damnit. Also, finally met up with my darling choir peeps I missed them very much and I felt very happy to be back in xms. This morning was a bit of a scramble. My mum found an album in the storeroom full of old Indochine banknotea, one of which is a  100 dollars Indochina banknote from 1936 that is apparently extremely rare and is valued over 1000$.
CUZ I DID MY RESEARCH GUISE GONNA BE RICH AND FAMOUS SUCKERS. Celebrated Kayden's 2 year old bday he is extremely adorable I love him very much.
Sidenote:
I hate feelings. I hate conflicted feelings. It's not even a matter of how the heart chooses to respond its confusing and unpredictable I feel like a bad person and yet I can't control, these reins I cannot restrain help I'm so confused

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