Goo Goo Dolls

And I'll give up forever to touch you
Cuz I know that you'll feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And i don't want to go home right now.

Pls comment on my story titled 'the tragedies of being forgotten in stone' its incomplete, you could say its part one. More to come.

Today was a lovely recess spent with 304. :) i love it when we have singalong sessions. Can't believe that is the last day of lessons. For the school term that is.

All the best for your exams! Take care!
Breaking Benjamin is my new thing haha the diary of Jane is madness.

When you try your best, but you don't succeed
When you get what you want, but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home,
And ignite your bones,
And I will try to fix you,

High up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I

Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Pls pls pls leave a comment on my story! Anyone out there

I will try to fix you.

I feel terrible.

I am so sorry. But I'll always be here for you. 

Cloudy eyed

Pls pls pls comment on my story titled 'Again'. Anyone out there

The tragedies of being forgotten in stone.

1987.
Unbeknownst to me, I make my final journey to the bakery, skid down the sidewalk to be in turn hidden by a sharp secluded bend in the street. Where I am heading to, pray no one will ever know. I toss a furtive glance behind, every nameless face I see sends me into a state of paranoia.

In my mind:
'Can you be in love with a stranger?'  'Yes.'
'To the extent of desiring so badly to embrace her in the crevices of your heart?
To carve your initials on her palms, and drown yourself in the scent of her blood?
To see tears eroding the sides of her cheeks begging you to stop?
Is this love? Say yes. This is love. Love means hurt. By hurting her I am loving her, I am in love.
This is love.
........................................

I am going to make her love me.' 

1987
8:31pm
Her name is Lavender. Actually I don't think I'll ever know her name. I call her Lavender because of the way her hair blooms meekly onto her shoulders just like the lavenders my Mother placed at my doorstep when she left. Deprived of love, life sucked out of its apologetic petals, its withered stem on the verge of death. I kept the lavenders under my dictionary, hoping to bury my Mother's apology under the weight of words, words that I would love to tell her, words that I would never tell her. And yet I couldn't dispose them. The overwhelming pungent of its decomposition haunts my dreams every night. Those lavenders and I, we are both decomposing. We are a tragedy, we are to vanish from the face of the world and have our names etched on stone and finally forgotten in stone too.

In my place:
Lavender is a magnificent creature. I am not saying this because I love her but because she really is one. I found Lavender under the Tree of Life 4 years ago. What beauty and allure she radiated, so sincere, so flawless, so pure...

1987
8:32pm
I am going to make her love me.

Again.

Again she painted her dreams now entangled and blurry. (Maybe even vague now) above the space pressing down hard on her chest. Lifting an almost unwilling finger she traced its outlines where lines intertwined to form an intangible mess. The beginnings melded into the ends.

Again she was tired of suppressing her undeniable fiery passion to leave everyone behind, to submerge herself into possibilities and greater unknowns. She was tired of being where she was at and not where her soul was at.

Again she wanted to be unsure. But then again she was never a certain person to begin with. But she was indeed clear of one thing. To be away from all the familiar faces and voices. To be thrown and tossed into a sea of unknown masks.

Again the normality and redundancy of life and its shortchanges (shortcomings/shortages) was taking a toll on her shoulders. She wanted something new. (not something new but something really really new. [dangerous]).

Come to think of it, she has experienced something new (not dangerous but close enough). In recent days she stumbled upon a meagre portion of strength carefully concealed in the pages of her freshly scrawled diary. This most certainly frightened her for she was never the brave one, the uncertain one-most certainly. The one who was always off course- of course.

So this was news to her, spectacular! , with that meagre portion of strength carefully conce.................. She managed to free her lonely mind from the treacherous reins of the past! WHAT AN ACHIEVEMENT her heart blared, (now proud and angry-with joy?) it was confirmed. She was no longer held back from her past, the unsightly, silent, supreme shadow that clung so desperately to her mind/heart/soul.

Two.
'Shut your eyes. Now open, wait stop,
Okay open them now, what? Don't look at me like that!
Give me your hand, oh cmon!

Can you feel this?

That was awkward... Can't believe I actually did that, please don't be mad.. just don't forget
Me.'

Again she was amazed by her own amazing qualities.
Again she reaffirmed the amazing ability to manipulate the affairs of her heart.
Again she still yearned for being away from being away.

Four.
'You had already forgotten me. That is why I had to... forgo
You.'

Breathe in.
Breathe out.
Again she found her cloud of secret (not so secret now) dreams.
Again she made it out alive.
Again she is still breathing.
Again she is still yearning.
Again she is still learning.

Breathe in.
Breathe out.

Wo bu yao du kuai jie hua wen

Sigh. Wo de hua yu zhen de na me can ma? Wo zi ji hai jue de wo xie de na pian shi yong wen hai xie de bu cuo. :(
Maybe I should consider migrating to Aussie and be a full time Aussie and have nothing to do with Chinese at all. Sigh shall move on with life. It's just one paper... but still. This just speaks volumes about my Chinese standards. Okay move on. HAIYO :(

OKAY SHUT UP AND MOVE ON.

Really admire the genius idea of the combine UG camp. Kinda got inspiration and I'm still toying with the idea of a similar camp but having no position in choir is making it hard to put words to actions. See how it goes, I've told Gerrard and Claire and KhaSim and Tricia and Everlyn about my idea really hope it happens. Ah for now its EOYs I kinda don't mind going for mastery to revise every single thing. Aish whatever la.

Emogirl_96

Happy bday Tosy!

Agvdhvrjvxc

My brain gets smart but my head gets dumb

Ohno.

Somebody is jealous of my wildfire s! Ahaha Ran into David at J8 and spent pretty long shopping for a clique present for a certain someone. Haha David gonna have sugar overload from the lollipop and me la. HAHAHA

I really really wanna get the cheerios outfit!

We could be friends,
And I promise that it won't go bad
But hopefully that story ends
But you ain't got nothing I never had.
-who let you go
The killers

Churchies

Church and YF was so fun today! :D
The sermon was 'reaching to  teenagers' and Pastor Stanley started off by singing Welcome to my Life by Simple Plan. So cool hor never thought church would do non gospel songs during service. :p actually I'm hoping we would sing Everything by Lifehouse. I'll post the lyrics up one of these days. Anyhoo the sermon was so awkward. Okay done move on.

YF was fun as usual. Josiah said he wanted to get the Warblers outfit and that I should get the Cheerios outfit. Oh mann, that would be legen-wait for it, oh you know the second half of the word let's say it tgt- DARY!!! hehehe esp if I could wear it for Youth Camp this year! So stoked for Youth Camp I hope there'll be an old skool nite like last year and GUESS WHO WAS CROWNED BEST DRESSED? HAHAHA haoliangirl_96
Anyhoo, we're starting a new study we even have like a reference book to follow .___.

Ahhhh so excited for Youth Camp its gonna be so fun! :D

Rawrrr you suckerrr :< whychu do this to meeeeee?!?!?!?! Should just ignore you for the rest of my life right! Nyehnyehnyeh

Have I mentioned? Linkin park is performing at the padang tonight in lieu with the Formula1 going on tonight. I hope they cover rolling in the deep but actually I'm not gonna be there so abit pointless ah. I hope Jenson Button wins only because he's cute ahaha I'm so shallow

Coldplay - Paradise live at Austin City Limits Music Festival, September...

ah, the magic they make is enough to bring me back to life.

All in.

You've begin to feel like home.

What is up!!!!

Nobody hi 5s me :( anyhoo.

Let's just say for the past months I made my best decision yet, a few days ago. Kinda got my wake up call from you and I realised there wasn't any point of running in circles all the time in my mind. It's draining and so very tiresome. But then again you get used to it cuz after a long period of time its sorta ingrained in you, like being a part of you so much so it feels strange and untrue to decide to feel this way. But you can't keep living this way. Self pity is gonna kill you and so is accepting how pathetic you are. But taking inspiration from barney stinson you realise there's so much more to feeling that emptiness every night before you sleep. I'm still trying but I won't give up that easily because if you can do it, I'm gonna take after you, I'm gonna learn from you and please don't make me return to square one. Some things I can't bear to throw can't bear to leave but I believe.. that you're gonna help me out.

Stop there, and let me correct it,
I wanna live a life from
A new perspective
You come along cuz I love your face,
And I admire your expensive taste.
PANIC! oh mann, brendon urie getting married! :(
Oh haha btw my guitar is called brendon! After brendon urie and brandon flowers!
Learnt a few chords today yay!

I may not be there but I know I'm on my way.

Gleeeeeeeeeeeeee!!

I WISHED I LIVED IN L.A. anyhoo, bryan gave me and jacky a guitar each ohmytianzxc that guy is awesome

IMMA LIVE IN L.A. NEXT TIME. lol idk why but I imagine some stuff and it happens in reality oh mann I'm genius. Maybe I shld imagine getting As for EOYs and then it'll really happen. That would be legen- kidding. That would be revolu-wait for it- tionary! Ah but I'm serious haha maybe I shld try it again to confirm this assumption.

I STILL WANNA LIVE IN L.A.
Have I mentioned, listening to kanye west puts me in the study mood. So gangsta!

what's your fantasy?

We watch the season pull up its own stakes
And catch the last weekend of the last week
Before the gold and the glimmer have been replaced,
Another sun soaked season fades away

You have stolen my heart
You have stolen my heart

Invitation only, grand farewells
Crash the best one, of the best ones
Clear liquor and cloudy eyed, too early to say goodnight

You have stolen my heart
You have stolen my heart

And from the ballroom floor we are in celebration
One good stretch before our hibernation
Our dreams assured and we all, will sleep well

sleep well(x4)

You have stolen
You have stolen
You have stolen my heart

I watch you spin around in your highest heels
You are the best one, of the best ones
We all look like we feel

You have stolen my
You have stolen my
You have stolen my heart

This is the most poetic song ever written. And yes, learning from a certain someone, I've decided to live life from a new perspective. I'm serious this time. It's been too long and I need an ending. About time anyway.

Glee tmr morning! SWARLEY!

Mondays like all mondays are draining.

Emmys this morning! Congratulations to all the winners! The glee cast looked stunning! :D

Embarrassing moment during Chinese today. I sometimes get so immersed in the 'zone' I don't notice anything at all. Sheesh.

Yknow I was thinking bout if I should go on Swarley mode until the end of time (kidding) maybe until an appropriate age and I almost convinced myself not to but,

BUT HOWEVER ON SECOND THOUGHTS

I figured that this Swarley mode would be best. You prolly have no cell of an idea what I'm talking about but its okay I don't know either haha
Joke of the day:
Px: isn't 'nestle' (nest-lay) pronounced as 'nest-le' ?
Me: its like how 'christle' is not pronounced as 'christ-lay'.
Mr Hu: but 'christle' is not pronounced as 'christ-lay' what.
Christle: HEY!!

Ah 304 has talented ppl!

Oh yes himym premieres today but technically, its still early in the morning over at US so it won't be online until tmr night. Or afternoon. .__.

Oh well. Mass jamming session in 304 tmr!

Paradise- coldplay

Sigh Mylo Xyloto alr out on itunes in US and this coldplayer has to wait till 24 Oct.
GOD bless me.
Church was enlightening I love church.
God be with all of you. :)

Mylo Xyloto

Most respected band of all time.
Okay I admit I'm on fangirl mode.

Trust me.

Your secret is safe with me.
HOW CAN ANYONE BE THIS CHARMING?!
Darren Criss ah, talented.

SUIT UP!

I think I am completely convinced that you finally found the courage and strength to move on after all this while and oh mann, I'M SO PROUD AND HAPPY FOR YOU :D yes I know its been so long and so hard and so tiresome but you did it! It really takes tons of willpower doesn't it? But you found new reasons to live and you're no longer tied down by the stone in your heart. I can sense that this time you're really not turning back, that you're not gonna go back on your own word and oh mann, embrace that freedom! We're all supporting you yeah! Trust me, you're gonna have the time of your life from 11 Nov to 20 Nov and haha I won't poison your food.

GIMME A COMPUTER MONITER FIVE BRO!
and yes Class 95fm is cool and classy.

Sexaye

We had a sex talk during Character Education today where they split the guys and girls to educate us on sex. Well, I've been through a few sex talks before in school and they were about the consequences of having multiple sexual partners with horrifying images of STDs. And I think that is enough to hurt the already low population growth in SG to an even all time low. Anyhoo there was this other sex talk on how to get out of sex, at least that was pretty okay. But today's sex talk didn't make sense at all. Idk bout you but if this was a plan to discourage us kids from having sex, its definitely working. I guess Holly Holiday from Glee sums up everything 'When you have sex with someone, you have sex with everyone they ever slept with.' Which pretty much makes sense and no I'm definitely not going there.

The haze in SG has pretty much cleared up and there is no need for utilizing a compass and map (or GPS if you're cool) to navigate your way outside. Maybe I'm exaggerating but that was how bad it was.

Been listening to all that you are by the Goo Goo Dolls and feel really blessed. I have no idea why. On second thoughts, I do haha. Let's just say most of the songs I listen to mirror my current illuminations I project in my mind. So you kinda get the picture?

5 DAYS TO GLEE SEASON 3! I'M STALKING ALL THE GLEE STARS ON TWITTER. OH ALL THE THINGS I WOULD GIVE TO HAVE THEM MENTION ME IN THEIR TWEETS. YES I AM DESPERATE.

All that you are

And I feel,
All the faint morning light,
Filled with hope 'cause you're here in my life,
And we've gone,
From the edge of our souls,
Made it back to a place we call home.

You, see me through,
I was alone in the dark and the fear was my truth.

Yeah, all the things that you are,
Beautifully broken, alive in my heart,
And know that you are everything,
Let your heart sing and tonight, we light up the stars,
All that you are.

I feel wrong,
I'm so human and flawed,
I break down even though I'm still strong,
And time, will make fools of us all,
Builds us up, and then laughs when we fall.

You, pull me through,
When I'm alone in the dark and the fear was my truth.

Yeah, all the things that you are,
Beautifully broken, alive in my heart,
And know that you are everything,
Let your heart sing and tonight, we light up the stars,
All that you are.

You're the sound of redemption,
The faith that I've lost,
The answers I'm seeking no matter the cost,
You opened the window,
Now I can see,
And you taught me forgiveness by giving your love back to me.

Yeah, all the things that you are,
Beautifully broken, alive in my heart,
And know that you are everything,
Let your heart sing and tonight.

Yeah, all the things that you are,
Beautifully broken, alive in my heart,
And know that you are everything,
Let your heart sing and tonight,
Let your heart sing and tonight, we light up the stars,
All that you are.

Oh I feel,
All the faint morning light,
Filled with hope 'cause you're here in my life

Yes, you deserve better than this.

Testing

I take a nap then I kitty kitty rap!

Happy days are here.

I can't seem to contain my excitement for Glee Season 3! At the sametime I feel extremely motivated to study! I'm feeling happier too! Wow this is Glee's positive influence I guess! Hehe.
It's Mid Autumn Festival today and I have yet to see an actual Kong min deng ever since ky told me about the existence of such lanterns last Mid Autumn Festival. Anyway its a Chinese tradition where family reunions occur and I honestly have no idea what ppl do nowadays but I dig mooncakes. I think kids carry lanterns. I prefer the paper lanterns though. That's about it.
Oh mann I love Queen! Under pressure is my current favourite song! I wish music nowadays hold as much creativity and respect as music back then. With that I shall end my post with under pressure lyrics. :p

Ahh I can't post the lyrics :l

P.s. the male species of gentlemen is endangered. Thank God at least one of them happens to be my close friend. Oh yes Jessie's Girl- Glee cast is an addictive tune I'm singing it all the time and I feel so happy! Wow I sound really.... D-bagish but whatever, I'm happy :)
And I wish you well too, cast your tears away. :)
Mann I sound way too optimistic and that is unattractive HAHAHA KIDDING

Great news

Glee  premieres on Sept 20 and how I met your mother on the 19 oh mann I'll have to resist temptation.

9/11
Always in our hearts.

Don't be a drag, just be a queen.

Gleeeeeeeeee was fantastic amazing so inspirational! Ahhhh river deep, mountain highhhhh
Rachel Finn Sam Quinn Kurt Blaine Puck Lauren Mercedes Santana Brittany Artie Tina Mike Holly are loved! I wish Sue and Will came though CAN'T WAIT FOR S3 HEHE with Samuel and Damien starring in Glee.

Talk, talk is cheap.

Give me a word you can keep.

It's ridiculous, its been months, and for some reason I just can't.

Just running in circles all the time, running in circles in my mind.

Chasing at tails, pulling your puzzles apart.

And by leaving my door open, I'm risking everything I own.

So I'll just say what you won't say, I'll take the blame if its for your sake, no turning back on what you can't save.

Supermassive blackhole

Outta the corners of my mind

Oh mann I kinda lost my mind/control/emotions/head today. Ah, let's face it, its a vicious cycle I will never leave.
Hopeless breathless endless restless relentless careless heartless

Ghosts of my past and the skeletons.

Wooooah coldplay is fantastic and inspirational. One day imma catch them live at their hometown (London) just found out onerepublic had a new song, live in colour. Somewhat similar to life in technicolour by coldplay but they are two very different songs. I can't wait for live in colour to be released! :p hehe
I can't find an album download for coldplay itunes festival but I'm just gonna keep waiting cuz I'm sure it'll pop out sooner or later. Ah well there's still 24 Oct! :D
Lately hero/heroine has been ringing in my head and that's exactly how I feel but I'm not sure if I should let myself feel this way. Halfway gone is on repeat too. And so is stolen but it doesn't really relate to me right now but the lyrics are poetic genius. I think I kinda like this state of stagnancy its better than feeling the thousands of emotions and have them tearing relentlessly at your mind. Well at least now I can think and its just in time for EOYs so hurray for me I guess?

Ties that bind

I realised I haven't been talking much about my family and over the years I discovered that my paternal side of the family has the most interesting stories ever. It's a pretty huge family and we could be a Taiwan drama serial. Trust me on that. We have enough characters and plus our drastically different backgrounds, we could take over tv, heck we could overrule wa meng ti!

I shall start by introducing my grandparents.
I don't think my ahgong is from China but idk bout his dad. Anyhoo, there's a portrait of my great-granddad hanging on one if the walls at my ahgong's place. I wonder of it would be disrespectful if I took a picture of it and posted it here. I hope not. D: okay my ahgong has siblings but I'm not sure how many. I know he has a brother cuz he visits us every CNY. My ahgong used to be a painter, according to my dad and idk what happened after that but apparently I think he's into construction and architect and somehow he became pretty rich after slogging it out so that's his life story I guess?
Idk how he met my ahma but anyway they got married and had 5 boys and 1 girl. My dad's the third boy and the fourth kid.
Woah feels like I'm explaining the family tree wahaha
Okay my first uncle (the first boy) is<br>
married to my first aunt. They have three kids, their first girl is the oldest grandchild, I think she's in her 20s. Their second is the first grandson and the youngest is a girl, who's 2 years older than me and we hang out pretty often.
My second uncle (second boy of course) is married to my second aunt and they also have three kids in the same order. Girl, boy (second grandson), girl. Their youngest is one year younger than me and we do crazy stuff tgt. My second uncle owns this packaging company under the moniker 'Eli'. Seems like every family business has the name 'Eli' O_O will elaborate soon enough.

Next is my aunt. She's married to guzhang. My aunt is a dentist and is also my dentist. I go to her clinic quite frequently. The equipment/instruments there are super cool but I don't like them when they're in my mouth :( anyway, the name of her clinic is Eli Dental (haha free advertising and publicity). My guzhang owns this optical shop, wait for it, Eli Optical and that's where I got my specs from. :p I hardly ever see my guzhang, only in the clinic where he picks my aunt from work. They have four girls and they're all extremely intelligent. The youngest is two years younger than me and we do the stupidest stuff ever. Like, texting each other pick up lines and other no life stuff DON'T JUDGE US.

And then there's my dad. He's married to my mum of course and there's me and Tim. According to my mum, I was the only grandchild my ahgong visited in the hospital after she delivered me and all my uncles and aunts were like 'waaah' haha I should be honoured right? Haoliangirl_96
Anyhoo, when I was younger my ahma used to call me Xiao chilli, in other words, small chilli. I have no cell of an idea why. Btw, I used to live at my grandparents' place when u was really young and I had a pet parrot which makes me cool. Hehehe
Anyway, Tim is the third grandson.

Okay time to makan my dad bought his iPhone 4. I shall continue my life story soon enough. Farewell for now!

Ahaha

Kenneth: eh my profile pic nice right?
Me: haha actually you look quite funny
Kenneth: okay I go change. Better?
Me: hahaha omg change back pls
Kenneth: okay wait. This one nice right.
Me: haha why all same shirt?

Merlion is so hilarious

All these feels strange and untrue

My nose is killing me. Anyway happy bday botak :) I hope the 02ers have a lovely time. Jesmona's guitar picks ate so chio! But technically I haven't tried them out but I bet they're fantastic. :) Xiexie! I love squishing the earphone thingy from bryan its like spongey foamy things it gets like compressed like some vacuum pack then slowly expands so funny ahah. Thanks times 1000000000!

I spoke to gordy ytd and there's smth about best friends that seem to make everyth feel alright. The distance doesn't matter as long as our heads are in the same channel. You have no idea how happy I am for you :)